Lately I’ve been scrutinizing my generation and trying desperately to understand why we do what we do. Lost, is the thing that comes to mind, when I think of my own circumstances.
Stanford grad and co-founder of PayPal, Peter Thiel wrote a book about startups called Zero to One. In it, he’s been able to clear some stuff up for me, as far as why our generation is a bit out of sorts.
An indefinite optimist, or any American born between 1982-present, sees the future as something that is “going to be better,” but he is very “unsure of the path” he will take to make it better. A hopeful with out a plan. Our parents, almost Boomers, but not quite, were born in the ‘50s and experienced a world that “got better every year for the first eighteen years of [their lives] and it had nothing to do with them.” My parents are as supportive as they come, but occasionally, we don’t see eye to eye. Thiel writes, “Since tracked careers worked for them, they can’t imagine that they won’t work for their kids, too.” Thank you, Peter Thiel.
Our generational differences are vast…maybe not as vast as the Black Panthers and their hard working, slave-born parents…but vast nonetheless. I just finished creating my first website, and by created I mean edited a template. Before I read Zero to One, I opened the Gallery page with “We are the lucky ones.” I also wrote something about being mediocre, as well as something about not knowing what comes next. On the About page I wrote, “I believe I’ll become great at something someday.” Completely hopeful, completely without a plan. He basically describes the whole of my current psychological struggle in less than two pages.
Discipline? Goals? Plans? My goal was to graduate college, my plan after that was almost nonexistent. I’ve been telling people lately, “I was this close to applying to a Documentary and Features MA program in London, but I decided to put it off because, the slightest chance I got in, it’d be too tempting to accept, and then I’d be committed.” Now I’m thinking, would that be such a bad thing, if it’s something I truly wish to pursue? Peter Thiel so eloquently states, “Indefinite attitudes to the future explain what’s most dysfunctional in our world today…we no longer [strive] to be great at something substantive…because everyone around us has long lost faith in a definite world.” He’s right, but…what if I just want to travel the world and give zero fucks for two more years?
Speaking of being committed. When it comes to relationships these days, it’s not a common word us free-spirited, backpacking, rave-going Millenials use very often. We settle for mediocre hookups with mediocre personalities. We’re all about mediocrity, and we don’t even realize it.
I was talking to an old coworker, probably a mere eight or so years older than me, and I was absolutely stunned when he said he once sold a guitar to take a girl out on a first date. I’m sorry, that shit doesn’t happen to people I know. There’s a huge sense of selfishness and individualism when it comes to relationships today. The hookup culture from college extends into the work culture post college and we’re just as set up for plummeting self-esteems as we were five years ago. Mathew Kelly, a man of deep faith and author of a book called Rediscovering Catholicism, explains how our culture is obsessed with individualism. The question “What’s in it for me?” he says, “is the creed of individualism and based on an all-consuming concern for the self.” He argues, “No community, whether as small as a family or a large as a nation, can grow strong with this attitude.” Which may explain why most of the relationships I experienced throughout college were shit. As unfortunate as it may seem, it’s true that “Our culture places a very high premium on self expression, but is relatively disinterested in producing ‘selves’ that are worth expressing.” In regards to this idea, Thiel argues, “By the time a student gets through college, he’s spent a decade curating a bewildering diverse resume to prepare for a completely unknowable future. Come what may, he is ready for—nothing in particular.”
It seems, these fine middle-aged white males have hit the nail on the head by concluding that our very own American society is spitting out a load of self-centered college grads with no idea what their future looks like, let alone what their purpose is. But hey, at least we’re hopeful, and for the time being, happily uncommitted.
We are products of this environment…neatly formed into cookie cutter young adults with absolutely no direction. And I thought my lostness was mine alone.
To our disadvantage, our educational system didn't exactly teach us what we’re good at. It promotes sameness in every way possible. We’re not encouraged to pursue greatly and with deep discipline the things we are very good at. The outcome is widespread mediocrity. And it doesn’t stop there. We produce individuals that are average at a large number of tasks but have been rewarded for stuff they’re not that good at their entire lives. Consequently, we feel entitled to money and power in the work place, even when we’re only mediocre at our jobs.
We expect rewards (was I not supposed to frame the 10,000 participation ribbons I received in K through 12th grade, yes 12th). What happened to being rewarded for the thing we’re best at?
It’s bugged me since at least 6th grade, when kids started giving each other labels: The nerd, The emo, The jock, The this, The that. I secretly wanted a label—I never fit under one. Recently a friend said to me, “You’re very much your own person.” I take that as a compliment now, and though I was my own person back then…I felt like I needed to be identifiable. Today, I’m just trying to find an identity.
There’s controversy over whether successful people are successful because they caught a few lucky breaks or because they planned, and conquered. It could be a touchy subject, so more on that another time. What if there were no such thing as coincidences? Only design and reason. Perhaps alternative words for God and science. Something is for certain, we must learn to have faith in a definite future, if we ever dream of finding peace of mind.
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